Friday, 25 February 2011

Hum dekhain gay ...


 
As someone who read up on 20th century revolutionaries quite a bit – although my readings were for mainly non-revolutionary reasons – I used to cringe every time I spotted a finance undergraduate or an aspiring MBA candidate in a Che Guevara T-shirt at my college campus in England. The irony of it almost never failed to hit me. Most of these kids were middle-class (in the British sense) or upper-class (in the Third World sense) whom Che would have shot without blinking his revolutionary eyes. But as we have all been forced to concede, Che is popular today not for his philosophy or political practice but for his face, i.e. as the quintessential postmodern icon, which means (relatively) different things to (relatively) different people.

In Pakistan too, after the Lawyers’ Movement of 2007, a new generation of urban youth has become enamored with the idea of revolutionary change. For them the closest thing to a homegrown, feelgood, postmodern iconoclast is the Urdu poet Faiz Ahmed Faiz. The man and his poetry have become one big symbol of the underdog, the idealist, as well as the man or woman who is willing to suffer for a cause.

On the occasion of Faiz’s 100th birthday, many events were organized across the country to celebrate and commemorate his life and work. I was quite pleasantly surprised to see so many young people turning up at different venues to celebrate someone who consistently supported causes that were dangerous then and are passé now, and who wrote in a language that is no longer considered fashionable.

But my delight experienced an early demise after a series of unfortunate events that have led me to believe that Faiz is celebrated – just like Che – as a symbol rather than for what he actually believed or practiced. I have by now met too many wannabe revolutionaries who print out Faiz’s avant-garde anthem ‘Hum dekhain gay’ in the Roman alphabet and call themselves Faiz aficionados. Reading Faiz, or for that matter any great Urdu poet, in the Roman script alone is a sacrilege, but for such people to claim to be an authority on his very vast repertoire of outstanding work, when they have only a chorus in mind, is both hilarious and infuriating.

I recently met one such specimen of a Faiz fan at a Faiz fest (fittingly, if you’ll forgive all the effing). The interaction, though it was mercifully brief, convinced me that Pakistanis can trivialize just about anything. What follows is an excerpt from our conversation.

Boy: Isn’t Faiz awesome?

Me: I believe he is.

The Boy: Isn’t his revolutionary work great.

Me: I am not sure what you mean by revolutionary work but I assume you are referring to his poetry against tyranny.

Boy: Yeah. So what do you think about his work.

Me: I have not read a lot of Urdu poetry and cannot compare his work with others but I truly admire Faiz’s ability to relate his internal, subjective world to the larger world and the fact that his empathy for people transcended geographical boundaries…

The Boy: That’s cool. He wrote for people from other parts of the world?

Me: Yeah, he wrote for the Palestinians and the colonized Africans and he showed compassion for Bangladeshi people when no one dared to do so. Haven’t you read Aye Arz-e-Falasteen?

The Boy: I can’t read Urdu. My family recently moved back from England.

Me: How have you read Faiz if you can’t read Urdu?

Boy: Oh I haven’t read him. I only know the revolutionary bits like “Bol ke lub azad hain teray” and “Hum dekhain gay.” You know we sang them during the long march and all! They are freakin’ awesome.

Me: Errr… but you do realize that Faiz is a lot more than those two “revolutionary bits” as you have called them…?

Boy: Yeah but those are the ones that matter

That boy is not alone. During my stint as a teacher of undergraduates, I came across many students who were filled with a similar zeal and wanted to change the world through Faiz’s poetry. It’s quite interesting that for such Pakistani students Faiz is the only symbol of liberation from oppression and exploitation. They are not familiar with other poets of the time, such as Josh Malihabadi, Noon Meem Rashid or Habib Jalib, to name a few. In fact, during my class on popular social movements, Jalib was referred to as the “dude who wrote songs for the Band Laal.” Jalib must have been somersaulting in his grave after that.

Most young people who claim to be impressed by Faiz’s poetry are familiar only with his famous poems; and they don’t even understand those. During one of our discussions, I asked my students about their views on Faiz’s employment of the Arabic term Ana-al-haq (or ‘I am the Truth’), attributed to the martyred Sufi Mansur Hallaj. I was looking for a response about the political struggle, about how Faiz may have tried to relate it to the personal quest for self-actuation. But it drew a blank from all my students except one. When I pointed out that Ana-al-haq has been used in one of the most popular anthems of our times – none other than their “favourite” Faiz poem, that’s right, you got it, the one that goes ‘Hum dekhain gay’ – I was bombarded with excuses that ranged from “Urdu is very difficult to understand” to “the poetry was against people like Musharraf and Zardari and not about religion.”

The sad reality of our times is that Faiz - the revolutionary is expropriated by everyone and anyone who thinks Faiz’s words can serve their purpose, especially by people against whom most revolutions are targeted. From right wing politicians to rich kids who are sent to liberal arts colleges abroad on money their parents made by running sweat shops, Faiz is the poet everyone loves to recite to lend credence to their rhetoric. In 21st century revolution loving Pakistan, Faiz’s popularity among a certain section of society represents ignorant kitsch which should not be taken seriously. During a recent protest, some of such Faiz lovers who espouse revolutionary ideas expressed displeasure at marching with trade union activists because they did not smell good.
Reciting Faiz in a party or to quote him in a blog or to join a facebook page can never replace real activism. Real activism means de classing yourself and to give gut and blood to the ideology we believe in. In this day and age when “idiology” has replaced “ideology” how many of us can remain true to what we believe in and are willing to walk in Faiz Ahmed Faiz’s formidable shoes.

A slightly edited version of this post has been published in The Friday Times

 

Wednesday, 23 February 2011

Things I see in Islamabad ...

If you happen to be/live in Islamabad, you will see banners thanking PM Yousuf Raza Gillani for retaining Senator Babar Awan (of Monticello University fame) as a federal minister.


A couple of days later, you see more banners thanking the PM for retaining Aapa Firdous as a minister and these banners are from PPP, Islamabad.



But if these are banners from PPP Islamabad, why are they just favouring the two Awans and not other PPP stalwarts?

PS: Reading the word "Sher Jawan" with Senator Babar Awan's name makes one wary of both the "shers" and "jawani". 

Sunday, 13 February 2011

Apa Firdous, you rock!


You know what, people may think I am a bloody nobody and Apa Firdous is well, Apa Firdous, but she and I have a lot more in common than anyone would ever guess. For starters, neither Apa Firdous, nor I have a Wikipedia page. I mean even bloody Fawad Alam has a Wikipedia entry but not us! What kind of world are we living in?
Apa Firdous in all her ministerial glory
Secondly, we both have crashed weddings of cricketers. She flew all the way to India to crash  attend the wedding of Shoaib Malik while I begged a friend – who was a genuine guest - to take me to Waseem Akram’s wedding. Even though I was a little girl back then, I was not too delighted when my sister called me a wedding crasher and I kept mum about it till the day Apa Firdous gloriously committed the same act. Being Apa Firdous, she did it loudly and she did it in style; gold crowns and family planning kits included. Thanks to Apa Firdous, I too mustered enough courage to come out and say, “yes I have been a wedding crasher once and I am not ashamed of it.”


Apa Firdous with that aforementioned gold crown.


Both Apa and I admire diverse linguistic expressions. I have chosen to be a writer to articulate my linguistic aptitude whereas Apa’s legendary linguistic proficiency is immortalized in this video where she insults a fellow parliamentarian in choice words – yes, swearing and name calling is an acceptable linguistic expression and there is no one who rips it like Apa Firdous.
Now Apa Firdous has a spanking new job and guess who is rubbing her hands with glee, good ol’ moi. I have earned my living through the business of information/communication all my life and I am so happy that Apa Firdous has joined our ranks by accepting the portfolio of Minister of Information. Personally, it has just brought me one step closer to Apa Firdaus. There may have been more articulate ministers in the past who were a lot more adept at handling media and information but Apa as the official spokesperson is so going to rock the ministry. Official briefings would now be in a different league altogether; fun times ahead.

Thursday, 10 February 2011

From the French Beach to the foothills of Margalla

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When I first went to college abroad, I was quite often asked if I find it difficult to get adjusted coming from a vastly different background and how “shocking” was the culture shock. Honestly, I never really had any trouble in getting adjusted to life in North West England. I was young, was acquainted with British sense of humour through television, knew the language, made friends very easily and was very keen to learn the slang so that I too can converse in local speak. Slipping into the life of a student was quite easy, especially when everyone else was as unfamiliar with the place as I was. No shock was shocking enough to merit anything more than a raised eye brow. 

After having recently relocated to Islamabad from Karachi, where I have spent most of my life, I am reminded of all those conversations about culture shocks and differences. Islamabad is neat, has a clean crisp air and a relaxed atmosphere bordering on lethargic. Karachi is chaotic with its salty sultry air and boasts of people that are always on the go. Although I just moved cities in the same country, I am more astounded by the differences now than I was back in my college days. 

Before I moved up north, I have been told by all and sundry about the laid back culture of Islamabad but you gotta be part of it to actually know how it works – or not. For instance gentle, reminders like emails are generally ignored, if you want to get things rolling, telephone calls, physical presence or best of all a telephone call from people who ‘matter’ would do the trick . If you are dealing with the bureaucracy, be ready to mouth the word ‘Sir’ at least a dozen times in a single conversation to get to them. If you are from Karachi, you would know how difficult it is to repeatedly say that word.    

In Islamabad, people, at least the ones that I come across to, generally assume that you have a driver and a cook and if you happen to mention that you have neither, they don’t know how to respond Another thing that I have noticed is that domestic help is much more obsequious in the cooler climes of Islamabad than in the coastal shores of Karachi. If we ever had to ask our driver to stay after hours or call him on his day off, we had to tread very carefully to make sure that we do not offend him in any way before we ask for the favour. Here in Islamabad, they throw ma’ams and begum sahibas left, right and centre. After 3 months, I have finally stopped looking over my shoulder every time someone address to me as ma'am.
 
Another thing I found quite shocking was that there are gyms in Islamabad that are not only exorbitantly priced, some of them like to be paid in Benjamins (that’s 100 dollar bills for the uninitiated) and they charge more than my monthly salary to make sure that their clients stay fit. Honestly, if someone is paying that amount of money, they would think at least thrice before putting a morsel of food in their mouth. 

Islamabad is beautiful, and all the more beautiful when it rains. It is quite possible to go out, enjoy the weather and have fun when it is raining, unlike Karachi where everyone rushes to home at the first hint of rain causing crazy traffic jams for the fear of water logged streets. Every generator owning Karachiite also head to the nearest pump to store petrol or diesel to bear the imminent long hours of electricity break downs that follow the first rain drop. But all is not hunky dory in the tree lined lanes of Islamabad. When you go home and you want to enjoy a hot bath and a hot meal, you realize you have to make do without them as gas supply is erratic, at best, during the winters. One is always found choosing between a hot meal or a hot bath. Running heaters before 10 o’ clock is out of question so hiding under the duvets is the general recreation during the long evenings of winter. 

Karachi is probably more overtly religious than Islamabad as one get to see more girls in hijabs/burqas and a lot more men in beards than in Islamabad perhaps because of greater class and ethnic diversity in Karachi.  Something else worth noticing is that more men dye their hair in the capital than they do it in Karachi. If one is perceptive, there is a pattern to be observed. On Monday mornings, men would be sporting jet black moustaches but as the week progresses, their white roots would start peeking and by Friday evening, they would be quite visible, come Monday morning and all the mustaches would be miraculously black again. 

Unlike Karachi, people in Islamabad actually follow traffic rules (though over speeding is quite common) and actually wait for the traffic signal to turn green before they push their foot down the accelerator.  Karachiites, unlike people in the sanitized capital, take pride in breaking the traffic signal and unless a traffic police constable is physically standing in their way, they would not stop when the light turns red. 

Islamabad perhaps boasts the maximum number of four wheel drives and expensive cars for a city that size in the entire region. One run from Kohsar Market to Fatima Jinnah Park and you would get to drive next to one massive expensive vehicle after another.  Karachi though has its fair share of mean machines on the road, is also the city of colorful rickshaws and minibuses. I quite miss checking out rickshaws with funny one liners or poetry over their tail lights. 

Anyone who has ever lived in Karachi would be familiar with flags of various political parties vying for your attention from the maze of electrical wires along with Free Afia Siddiqqi banners. Islamabad, on the other hand, has hoardings with pictures of the Prime Minister and the President along with the recent visiting dignitaries from our friendly neighbours – be it Turkish President or the Chinese premier. Karachiites are used to staying at home because of violent strikes whereas people in Islamabad get a day off when Chinese head of the government address the joint session of the Parliament. 

Islamabad is serene in comparison to Karachi’s commotion. No quacks are selling you quick solutions to regain your manhood or to get back the love of your life. Despite all its greenery and rose and jasmine garden, it is insipid for someone who has lived in Karachi.



View of Islamabad from Peer Sohawa
Rainy roads of Islamabad


Film hoardings at the cinema in Saddar  makes Karachi all the more rangeen

The regular rallies in front of Karachi Press Club

The most awesome rickshaws dot the streets of Karachi

Originally published in The Friday Times.


This screen shot of the page is duly provided by Abid Hussain of The Friday Times

Tuesday, 8 February 2011

that's some love ...


In most sports there are moments captured by camera which are unintentionally homoerotic. Sometime back, HuffPo profiled some such shots but most of them were from contact sports like American football, Ice hockey and wrestling where such photos are inevitable.
Here in our little, but densely populated, corner of the world, we have cricket which is a gentlemen’s game and chances of such photographs are minimal but our boys in green do not disappoint us and do provide our photographers with some gems.

Afridi is the undisputed national object of man crushes, it was but inevitable that he would get some love

But here, Yuni Bhai insists on piggy backing Akhtar ...


... who in turn takes advantage of Mohammed Asif ...

 

but he eventually gets crushed by SRK





PS: Though Afridi is the undisputed man crush but the one person common in all these pictures is Shoaib Akhatr, does this mean Lala faces some stiff competition in his own team? 







PPS: What's with SRK and Pakistani cricketers, I mean seriously?

Friday, 4 February 2011

Get cruel or get out.



Earlier this week, I wrote a post about how a 17 year old boy was arrested under Blasphemy ordinance for writing unpleasant remarks about the prophet. 

Most newspapers just reported the same brief report that he wrote something in the papers which lead to his arrest but Rabia Ali of The News is perhaps the first reporter who bothered to visit the boy and presented a humanized image of a conflicted teenager who fears for his own safety – even inside the prison – and is burdened with guilt for bring trouble to his mother and siblings. 

This is his story as narrated in The News
Constantly shivering, the 17-year-old student accused of writing objectionable comments in his first-year examination papers speaks in a very low voice.

“I was mentally disturbed. I was unaware of what I was doing. It was all unintentional.”
Tears well up in his eyes and he looks down on the floor, thinking of what would happen if he was ever to leave the juvenile jail — his current home.

“I don’t feel safe here either. I have been isolated from the rest of the inmates and I’m scared to tell them about the charges against me. They still don’t know why I’m here. Outside, I know it would be much worse. I would have to change my name, and maybe my identity.”

The student was sent to the juvenile prison on judicial remand till February 11 for allegedly writing blasphemous remarks in the answer-sheets on the complaint of the Board of Intermediate Education (BIEK). He was arrested on January 28 and presented before the court next day.

But what he did, he claims, is greatly linked to some past incidents. His father’s death devastated his life and his cousins influenced his religious beliefs. These and other happenings, the boy says, misled him into writing the offending remarks.

The lean-framed teenager repeats: “I was under severe mental stress, and whatever I did was unintentional. I did not mean it, and I deeply regret what I did.”

“In 2008, my father who was working in the air force passed away. I was traumatized. Being the eldest of my siblings, I felt a huge responsibility on my shoulders to support the family,” he wipes the sweat off his brow.
The family went into financial straits, surviving on the pension of the deceased.

“I wanted to get good grades and a good job to earn a living for my family. When I got 69 percent marks in Matric, I was very upset. Since my father’s death, I’ve been under so much stress. I can’t stop shivering since then.”

When Sami’s cousins from Norway paid him a visit, they worsened his mental condition. “I used to pray five times a day and recite the Holy Quran. But when my cousins came, they influenced my beliefs and discouraged me from following the religion.”
It was a hard phase, Sami believes. A fight was taking place inside him — between good and bad, right and wrong.
“I was double minded and confused about a lot of things. Whether what my cousins are saying is true, or what I’ve been practicing all my life. During my first-year exam last year, I did not know what I was writing in the paper. It was unintentional.”

When the pre-engineering results were announced in November, Sami Ullah’s result had been withheld. He knew there was something wrong. After 10 months, in January this year, the Intermediate Board broke its silence and issued him a show-cause notice, followed by a visit by the controller examinations and his colleagues. They asked the boy to write an apology.

“They told me to write an apology and asked me to confess to my crime. I thought that after my apology, they would understand my mental status and would forgive me. I was wrong. They rather filed an FIR at the Shahra-e-Noor Jahan police station.”

On January 28, he was arrested, thrashed and beaten up the whole night at the police station, before being brought to the jail. My family says that they are not being threatened, but I know things will become difficult for them soon. For the time being, my neighbours are supporting my family.”

It was the boy’s neck or mine

Commenting on the case of Sami Ullah, Chairman Intermediate Board of Karachi Anwar Ahmed Zai admitted that he was aware of the severe repercussions of the case.

“It was the boy’s neck or mine. I was aware of the harsh consequences which the boy and his family would have to go through, but we could not do anything. Our legal adviser advised us to take action against the boy, or else we would be in hot water. The professor who checked the papers had sent reports about the incident to other places. My hands were tied.”

When Controller of Examinations BIEK Agha Akber Mirza, also the complainant in the case, was asked as to why the board decided to take action 10 months after the incident, he said that the papers were checked in September and then an Unfair Means Committee investigated the matter to verify Sami Ullah’s writing.
He said that the boy had apologised, but still they had to highlight the case due to its sensitive nature. “The crime is severe.”

Need for psychiatric evaluation

Human rights activists and psychologists have called for a psychiatric evaluation of the accused boy, saying Sami seems to be suffering from a mental disorder.

Prominent psychiatrist Prof S Haroon Ahmed told The News the boy might be suffering from Obsessive Compulsion Disorder, in which an idea against the person’s belief system keeps recurring in his mind. Such extreme thoughts can torture him with guilt and depression.

“Such thoughts could also be against one’s religion. The person is fearful of disclosing such thoughts in public, and due to the fear and guilt, is compelled to divulge them. In this case, the boy wrote them down. I suggest that a psychiatric evaluation of the boy is carried out.”
Representatives of the Society for the Protection of the Rights of the Child (SPARC), who have also visited the boy, called for establishing a medical examination board to assess the boy’s mental status. “Sami Ullah is mentally disturbed. We demand that a board should be set up, and he be examined thoroughly.”


My heart goes out for this boy who has a dark and dangerous future ahead of him. What kind of a sick and twisted society we are that we get high by maligning and physically beating a teenage boy. What kind of cruelty compels us to go all vigilantes on poor unsuspecting victims? We are a nation of flesh eating vultures who are just waiting for someone to commit a folly (which in this case is holding an opinion which is different from the majority) so that they can torn apart. The way things are going; soon there would no room for compassion and camaraderie among human beings. There will be just tormentors and sufferers. If you are vindictive and malicious, you are quite at home but if you are empathetic and considerate, there is no room for you. The message is clear: get cruel or get out. 

For those who inflict this in the name of religion should know that a religion – any religion for that matter – is not just a sum of rituals and calls for love and compassion for fellow humans.


Dard-e-dil ke wastay paida kiya insaan ko,
Warna ta’aat ke liye kuch kam na thay karr-o-biyan 

.

Thursday, 3 February 2011

Afridi - the quintessential Pakistani

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In 21st century Pakistan, cricket can be called the opiate of the masses, and the hardest most potent drug of all is one Shahid Khan Afridi. Pakistan has produced far better cricketers than Afridi who brought greater accolades and honor home, some were even bigger stars and some had more charisma but no one invoked as much passion among its subjects as Shahid Afridi does, for he is, undoubtedly, Pakistan’s favourite son.
Pakistan, unfortunately, is divided on most matters, whether it is the matter of royalties for natural resources, water distribution or Veena Malik’s conduct in the house of Big Boss; what Pakistanis agree on, wholeheartedly is that Afridi is essential to cricket in Pakistan and they would want him around for as long as he can play. Afridi is the biggest - perhaps the only - leveler in Pakistan. He belongs to everyone and is adored by all with the same intensity.
Pakistanis whether living at home or abroad love Afridi, whether they are young, old or senile, they love Afridi. Whether they are male, female or a hermaphrodite, they love Shahid Afridi. Whether they are gay, straight, confused, bisexual, trysexual or asexual, they love Shahid Afridi. Whether they are tribal or urbane went to one of the Peela schools or something as elitist as Aitchison or KGS, they love Shahid Afridi. They love Afridi because essentially they can all see a little bit of themselves in him, for he is a quintessential Pakistani – irreverent, restless, a little rough around the edges, impulsive, talented, street smart, ambitious but a little clueless (ok, Pakistan is a lot more clueless, but this is not the place for that rant), quirky and oh-so-endearing.
Though his heart is always in the right place, like most of Pakistanis, the line for right or wrong is a little blurry for him. He has danced and hopped and walked on a pitch to make it work - of course for the country –got caught and was forgiven by all because he was doing it for the motherland. He tried chewing a ball with over a couple of dozen cameras zooming in on him – again for the country – and we absolved him. He was impulsive and did not think but we forgave because we all have been guilty of doing the same. Afridi, probably like most of the Pakistanis, believed that the end justifies the means and was willing to go to any lengths to win it for us, even if meant chewing a ball with Umar Gul’s sweat on it!
Afridi has announced his retirement as frequently as Lindsey Lohan has attended rehab – which is an insane number of times – but he always comes back and we always welcome him with open arms
Though Shoaib Akhtar and Mohammed Asif have gained more notoriety for getting banned, Afridi too has had his share of bans for pirouetting on the pitch in Faisalabad, for mistaking the ball for an apple in Dubai and hitting a spectator with his bat in South Africa. He also received various reprimands from PCB for shooting from his mouth. Unlike Akhtar and Asif, Afridi is can transgress like no other and is still forgiven by all.
Just like most Pakistanis, Afridi too has gone through an identity crisis. He got into the team as a leggie and then scored that record breaking earth shattering mind numbingly stupendous century and deluded himself for a very long time that he is a batsmen. He then thought of himself as a batting all rounder. However, unlike most Pakistanis, he has metamorphosed into what he was always destined to be – a bowler. Though his heroics as a bowler are legendary these days, the idea of an Afridi six still has aphrodisiac like qualities and despite coming to terms with the fact that he is mainly a bowler, we all yearn for those blows that have enthralled us all for oh so long.
Just like other Pakistanis, Afridi refuses to learn and continues to make the same mistakes. While Pakistanis continue to elect the same old faces and vacillate between democracy and dictatorship, Afridi continues to squander his wicket playing one suicidal shot after another. He may shake his head and vow never to slip-up again but every time he puts on the pads, out goes the memory and the rush of blood propels him to do the same – all Pakistanis have been guilty of this, hence we forgive our mercurial Lala for all his follies.
Diplomacy and tact are alien to most Pakistanis; we are one of the most “in your face” people in the world and Shahid Afridi is a true son of Pakistan. Whether telling the world that PCB has announced the team without his consultation or calling Yasir Hamid an idiot with mental faculties of a 15 year old, Afridi never shied away from making his opinions known.
Lala is the only Pakistani and third player in the world to have scored 6000 runs, taken 100 catches and 250 wickets in ODI history. He is also the first, and to date only, cricketer to have taken 50 wickets in T20 and also holds the record for hitting maximum number of sixes ever but we also know that we don’t love him for his cricketing prowess.

Let’s admit it. Lala is not the best cricketer who has ever graced this land, nor is he most articulate, but he is magic when he is on field, even when he does not do much. But when it is his day, he is breathtaking. Back in 2005, I went to see an ODI against England in Karachi. The crowd screamed when Afridi’s name was announced as he was back in the side after two match ban. He came and played a short and sweet innings like he mostly do. He got run out because of a bad call from MoYo. So miffed was the crowd with MoYo that he dared to get Lala out, the a full capacity National stadium booed him and the stand I was in did not even cheer him for his half century. That was the day I was convinced that Lala transcends it all and appeal to people like very few mortals can. He can temper with the pitch and get banned, eat the cricket ball, cavort with Indian actresses, peddle awful soda drinks, kill animals and gets away with it all.

Afridi sells and every brand manager worth his salt knows it. He can add the cool quotient to something as mundane as rice or toothpaste and make it popular beyond its target audience because Lala’s audience is just about everyone. If anyone has doubts, they should check his title of Boom Boom on the shirts of the whole cricket team – a brand name that is coined after him. Heck, he has even made spin bowling look sexy.
Here is some Lala love for all Afridi fans.




Lala is not at home in test kit
Lala ki sawariyan
Lala is awesome in a car

But then Lala is just as awesome inside a plane

and no one can rock bus riding like Lala does

Lala - the sartorial wonder
Lala in a cap

Lala does wonders for chappals

Lala attempting Levity

All tied up and ready to go

on the right head, even namaz ki topi can be a fashion statement

Modeling for his own brand

Working a floral shirt

Working desi formals - with ice cream parlor chor in the background




Afridi with relief goods in Balochistan during 2007 floods

Afridi signed up for I-Own-Karachi campaign

Flood relief work in KPK

Flood relief work

Awww I got visited by Lala


Probably telling the mates how did he dance around the pitch and got banned


He models with mates when the occasion calls for it, sometimes even the crew joins in


Even Brett Lee is charmed by our Lala

But MoYo is more interested in Burger (Would Burger King be Halal enough for MoYo?)

Doing the kaptani duty

Convincing the coach that he indeed is a lucky bastard

With Rashid Lateef

Lala in groupie mode with Courtney Walsh

Younus loves him as much as we do

Lala inspires awe in his fans ...

This kid is in seventh heaven

aray yaar camera tau hathao samnay se

Adoration

Lala in the middle

Yes!!! got an autograph. My friends will be, like, so jealous.

demand for autograph is just as great among aunties..

and kids ...

and gora people


the police walah is probably envied by his colleagues


Lala craze in unfazed


This girl is ecstatic but who can blame her,he is actually holding her hand




Lala the family man



playing with daughter

Come on Lala, keep your children away from Kakmal, he is bad influence

and he should also keep his girls away from Inzi and his towel clad gaddi nasheen son


With Aqsa and Ajwa


in pain


Lala in action

defying gravity with blond highlights

with gray hair at the temples

major lolz, Lala attempting to read ICC rulebook. Kakmal and Gullay are not even trying




Lets get that one

At times, Lala kills soft furry birds

but then he takes on a snake as well

Though he gets paid shitloads of money to peddle pepsi, he is not averse to other brands

Telling reporters to bow down to his awesomeness

Making prayers look cool (YK needs to shave though)

What??? Lala leading the prayers even when MoYo has a bigger beard and spend far more money on beard hair dye!!!

Under pressure, he can mistake the ball for an apple

Sublime!

If only I had food available, I would not have eaten that ball

Inzi bhai tau road pe lay aye hain yaar

the strut

that's why I sell that shampoo

is that a hint of a paunch? the fans really don't care




Lala can also work a pole without stripping



Self love much? ghar ke har kamray main apni hi photo

o ja bhai, rasta pakar




SRK wants a piece of Lala


Lala is so beyond cool that even Ashton Kutcher copied his look


With arms wide open

and still open


oh the arms




and that's how it became the signature style

and here I am ... again


I get escorts, but not the right kind

Come on man, you gotta listen to me..


yes, cheer me on

yar bhaji, you dont crack Patha jokes and I wont crack sardar jokes

Lala is so nice, he even takes care of the crying babies

Need some breathing space please




Samson Afridi



Yeah baby




A towel over shorts!!! I think Lala is trying to hide the fact that there is less fab and more flab around the waist


An ass-tastic view


PS: this is perhaps the most time consuming post ever
PPS: I initially posted some 85 odd pictures but then decided to go for a century, so added a few more.