Bromances and brokeback !

So Cricinfo tweeted this photo with a “So much love in the Pakistan team” caption earlier today.

and the Pakistani twitteratti responded with this photo saying what about this one?

Pakistani tweeples thought that the picture with Ajmal and Akhtar was more bromance whereas the one with Sachin and Sehwag was more ... errr. Brokeback. 

I asked people to come up with captions and here are some of the more interesting ones.

@shiringul “if I lose my head, it's your ass on the line!”

@a_bong "I got your back ..."

@ammaryasir   Sehwag: "Pedicure?" Tendulkar: "Ahaa, usual preparation for the big match against Pak"

@absarshah   'Sucking the marrow out of life"

@kamranbukhari   “Ass, gas or grass, nobody rides for free”

@alexpressed “baout yaraana lagta ay!”

@fayyazahmed  Tendulkar: "Cover my behind, will ya?"

@Ahmad_Malik  “After an intense batting session, Sehwag helped Sachin take care of his guard problems.”

@Zonk_D  Sehwag "I got your back ! " Sachin - "only if you keep your head in right place " ; )

Haya Fatima came up with “Bum chick chick bum, bum, bum chick chick bum!!”

Nabeel Zuberi came up with "Turn over and do it the Afridi way, Viru."

Ibrahim Muhammed Khalil gets a special mention for double submissions along with Aneela Z Babar.

Ibrahim came up with “jin pe takya hay, wohi hawa daynay lagay” and “CYA - Cover your Ass”

And @AneelaBabar  came up with gems like “The Butt stops here” and “Haseena Atom Bum Part 2”

And winner is @amna_kaleem  who came up with this sterling line “Who needs a shoulder when you have Sachin's bum to lean on.”

Here are some other caption worthy pictures. 

Defying gravity?

An India Pakistan game can make Service Cheetah go all witty

Arrrggghhh! enough with the lecture already...

Somebody get me out of here

Orange is the new black

bach ke jayega tu kahan

To borrow a line from Ali Azmat, bum bum phatta 

Audition for High School Musical 4?

Byoz offering prayers, the only one missing is good ol' Shoiab Akhtar :)

Electrified!

Poster boy for liposuction!

What's a pressure cooker, we live in Pakistan

Back in 2006, my friends and I went to National stadium Karachi to see a match between West Indies and Pakistan. Though it had nothing to do with the match, for every Boom Boom poster we’ve made, we made one that said Darryl Hair Sucks. For cricket fans in Pakistan, umpire Darryl Hair was the most despised human being that year. Last year, it was the bookie par excellence Mr. Mazhar Majeed (those who are on twitter and want to tell him personally what a ch**t piece he is can do it here). During this world cup, Pakistan cricket team’s number 1 enemy seems to be Mr. Ian Chappell.

Chappel has had problems with everything; from our idiot of a captain to our team huddle to the celebrations by the same captain. Everything we do seem to rile him up. In addition, he thinks we are not capable of winning the world cup because we cannot beat three teams in a row. Mr Chappell is of the opinion that “Mahendra Singh Dhoni is a much calmer leader than Shahid Afridi” and that India under Dhoni is more capable of taking pressure on than Pakistan under Afridi.

Now don’t get me wrong; I think Dhoni is one of the smartest Indian cricketers and he is one hell of a fighter but things are not as stacked against him as they are against our Lala. Lala lost two of his front line bowlers last year to the spot fixing scandal, he has been playing his home series in places as varied as Dubai and England, he has not played a single game in front of his home crowd since March 2009, but he still managed to galvanize a traditionally fractioned team into a cohesive unit where everyone (barring Kamran Akmal) is doing what they are supposed to do to the best of their abilities. Mind you, he does not even have the human resource that some of our past captains have had at their disposal yet he still managed to get team Pakistan in the last four, something that eluded us in the past two world cups. If this is what idiocy is capable of, then I say bring on some more of the same madness – Lala’s brand of madness. Considering the lives we all live and the battles we all fight everyday for mere survival, I think no one can handle pressure better than a Pakistani and our men in green are just as capable of surviving the pressure cooker in Mohali as anyone else, if not more.

Lala's brand of madness

The other person who is being booed by Pakistanis, though with a little less intensity, is ICC chief Haroon Lorgat. To say that Pakistanis have been irked by his wish for a fairy tale ending for Sachin Tendulkar would be putting it mildly. Mr Lorgat wishes/believes that India will win the semi final and that Sachin Tendulkar will get to make his 100^th century in International cricket in Mubai in front of his home crowd which will be an awesome end to the little master’s career. It seems that ICC chief, who should have been impartial, has actually not been impartial and if his words are to be taken seriously, then the whole tournament is organized not to see which team has performed best, but to provide that fairy tale ending to the Indian cricket team in general and to one Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar in particular.

Mr Lorgat sucking up to Indians

I wish team Pakistan goes on to win the Semi final and the final so that we can rub it on Mr Lorgat’s face.

Here is wishing the men in green all the good luck, I hope you bring the cup back with you and give us something to smile about.

The idiot who will do the trick

Some awesome men in green

Awwwww

Two is company ...

For the first time in a very long time, our cricket team looks united and act like a team – considering the fact that we still have elements like Kakmal, it’s a feat. There is no news of factions or back biting and as rumor has it, all is well in the dressing room. Even the captaincy debate did not turn acrimonious and both Misbah and Afridi praised each other and were willing to play under the other. However, just like the animal kingdom where some animals are more equal than the others, there are some relationships which are stronger than the others.

Of late, Shoaib Akhtar and Shahid Afridi seem inseparable. Had they been teenage girls, they would have been certified BFFs. But the very obvious regard they have for each other is very endearing – at least to their fans.


Shoaib Akhtar cannot refuse when Lala calls for him




Akhtar thinks that he and Afridi are the two sartorial wonders in the team

and here is some pictorial evidence

If we were not totally smitten by these two, this one would come across as an odd one.

Back in the day when both Lala and Akhtar were part of the test squads

Akhtar: Not now Fawad, this is between me and Lala

Let's see who roars more ferociously

Is Lala checking out Akhtar's ass?

Two is company, three is crowd.

Yeh Dosti, hum naheen chorain gay

Sheer awesomeness of Aapa Firdous

Politicians come and go but no one can match the epic awesomeness of one Aapa Firdous. You need evidence, see the picture below. There are other politicians nearby but it is Aapa who is festooned with maximum number of garlands – and that too in pink frilly ones.

Other politicians may be popular with either men or women. Some are lucky enough to be popular with both, but Aapa is well liked not only among good men and women of the fine city of Sialkot, she is all the rage with eunuchs in the city. Who else can claim that?